url https://youtu.be/Z24SRmw

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Everything you described was what my mother did to me…I am a 70 year old woman. She turned her venom on me through slandering me to our entire community, my children, anyone and everyone she came into contact with. Thanks to Dr. Ramani though I have come through this agony and now feel actual joy in living my life. It is never too late for recovery from this horrible abuse.

I was the scapegoat of my family. My father was the narcissist. I have four siblings and my mom. I wasn’t free of my dad until he passed away. As soon as he did a weight lifted off my shoulders and I could finally stand up to my siblings and mom. They absolutely did not know how to deal with me not being a punching bag and trash can for all their bs. I can now say I am truly happy and I’m working on healing the little girl in me that was so hurt as a child.

“No human being should ever have to be the psychological punching bag for another person. Or the pacifier. Or the regulator.” Healing to hear that affirmed with conviction. Thank you, Dr. Ramani!

I was a scapegoat that walked away three years ago, at age 56, from my malignant narcissistic monster / mother. I don’t know how I survived. I always thought I must have had the worst narcissistic mother out there until I started to watch these videos. Peace be to anyone else that walked away.

I was the scapegoat for my narcissistic father. As I got older, I kinda challenged him about it, but got told that ‘I had a chip on my shoulder’. At aged 7 or 8 I was bullied at school, but kept it to myself for fear of my father saying, ‘Well, you must have done something for them to be doing that to you’. I just felt so alone.

Commenting as a scapegoat daughter of a narcissistic mother. As soon as I was old enough to assert my independence and left, she immediately initiated a scathing smear campaign. I went no-contact with my mother as soon as I could get out, and now no one in my family reaches out to me anymore. She smeared my name to the rest of the family, inventing horrible deeds I’ve never done or grossly exaggerating any transgression she could find. I lost my entire family when I got out. That was the price she made me pay for losing power over me. There is always a price to be paid when the scapegoat stands up and says “no more.”

The thing about getting out completely (which happened to me) is that when I realized that in order to just be at peace in my life I had to just walk away. I knew that by walking away, because of all the slander that had been going on for years against me, I would basically prove to everyone that I was a “bad” person because my absence would validate all the ways the narcissist had negatively interpreted me to everyone around. Like “Oh you see, she left us in the dust, because she is selfish and does not give a f about anyone”. But I realized that the way I was thinking was also another trap set by the narcissist. If I stayed to fight for my true image, I would have to continue to suffer the constant devalue and the constant going out of my way to please the narcissist. But if I left, and gave up on fighting for my true image, then the narcissist would simply use my absence and silence to put whatever they wanted in people’s mind. I walked away for my own sanity. Because my peace was more valuable to me than caring what anyone who does not take the time to know me could care. And the humbling in my experience was basically acknowledging that yes, I was going to be interpreted negatively, because I was NOT going to be there to defend my image, but that is okay. Because if someone can blindly believe that I can possibly be a bad person without even giving me the chance to hear my side, then that means that’s someone I am better off not sharing my time with. To walk away successfully you have to be okay with being seen as a bad person, but most importantly you have not care, because YOU know who YOU are.

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When narcissists lose their scapegoat

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When narcissists lose their scapegoat