The Chaos Theory of Narcissistic Abuse
Each time a narcissist’s target completes another cycle of emotional abuse, there is a window of opportunity called a Choice Point. It’s in this place where we have the chance to change the negative cycles that have become a pattern…in our lives and those of the people we love.
.. It’s challenging to stop and think about this when you’re in constant fight-or-flight mode during narcissistic abuse. But, the choices we make now not only affect our future, but the futures of our children, our grandchildren, our workplaces, our neighborhoods, and our society.
.. But then, your traumatized subconscious mind tries to beat your cognitive mind to the ground. Almost instantly, you start wondering how you can make the narcissist accountable or how you can get back into their good graces so they’ll choose you over their affair partner.
.. Option A – It’s during our “Not This” moments that we can choose to start planning something different for ourselves. We may not know what that will look like, but in the moment, it doesn’t matter. All we know is “Not This”. There is no turning back.
Option B – Or, after the dust settles, we choose to “work on” the relationship because staying means less upheaval than leaving. At least with a toxic partner, we know what to expect. Nobody’s life is perfect, right?