“Ally! How are you doing since the breakup?”
“Oh! That was a while ago. I’m doing great!”
“Are you? I know these things take time to get over. And that’s okay. You don’t want to rush yourself.”
“Not at all. It was for the best.”
“OK. Because you know Danny is seeing someone else now.”
“Yes. He told me.”
“OK, because people are worried about you. I thought you deserved to know.”
“I know and I’m fine with it. I’m seeing someone also!”
“Wow, that was quick. Does he know you just got out of a relationship?”
“Do you want some caramel cheesecake?”
“No, thank you! I’m full and I’m trying to cut back on dessert.”
“Ice cream? Chocolate mousse?”
“Really, I can’t.”
“You can have dessert every now and then!”
“I’ve already eaten dessert this week. I have goals, so no.”
“Well, it looks like you’ve already lost weight.”
“Maybe two or three pounds.”
“You don’t want to get too thin and frail looking. Being underweight is unhealthy too. I’m a little worried about you.”
“I am in no danger of becoming underweight.”
“OK. Just don’t deprive yourself. It’s no fun being thin if you’re miserable.”
“You coming to happy hour?”
“Sorry, I can’t. Big deadline at work.”
“You can’t spend one night out?”
“Not right now. I don’t want to lose momentum.”
“You don’t want to become one of those people who ‘lives to work.’ I’m worried about you. Remember your company doesn’t care about you. If you died, they’d replace you tomorrow!”
“They pay me well, actually, and my name is on this product. So this is important for them and me.”
“OK. Well, you seem really tired. We just don’t want you to work yourself to death…”
“We?”
“People are worried about you. It seems like all you do is work.”
“We just went out last week!”
“OK, just don’t let them take advantage of you.”
Concern trolling. When you’re failing at everything, the idea of your friend succeeding is unbearable. So try to destabilize her and make her second-guess her confidence.
Convince her that her situation is far worse than she believes and she’s the only one who doesn’t see it—and do it under the pretense that you’re protecting her best interests.
Watch Out For This Kind Of Troll
Urban Dictionary defines a concern troll as “someone who is on one side of the discussion, but pretends to be a supporter of the other side with ‘concerns.'” In other words, it’s someone who pretends to support you but couches their disagreements in the form of “concerns,” which allows them to justify criticism as the result of worrying about you. “I’m on your side,” they say, “but you shouldn’t do X, Y, and Z. It looks bad to some people — not that I agree, but I thought you should know.”
Interestingly, the Geek Feminism Wikia notes that “concern trolls are not always self-aware; they may also view themselves as potential allies who have just, oddly, never met a feminist opinion they liked.”
This isn’t to say that concern trolls target only feminists; however, feminists do often put up with a good deal of concern trolling. What’s of note here, though, is the fact that, regardless as to what their area of “concern” is, concern trolls don’t always know that they actually are concern trolls.
As a term, concern trolling gained widespread use in the end of 2013 and beginning of 2014, especially after a piece was published in the New York Times expressing concern that a cancer patient was too public about her treatment. The author justified his criticism by saying her efforts to fight cancer would make her unhappy and other patients look bad — pretty much the epitome of concern trolling.
Officer Threatens Psych Evaluation for Man Excersizing 5th Amendment Right
Officer tries to get a reaction from man temporarily parked a private shopping mall.
concern troll
Concern trolling involves someone opposing an idea or viewpoint, yet acting like they’re an advocate for the cause. A concern troll offers undermining criticisms under the guise of concern. Their goal is to sabotage the cause being discussed, and to inspire doubt among group members. This occurs in groups rallied around a particular issue, especially in political parties, and the goal of concern trolling is to cause dissent within a community.