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10 Mind Games Narcissists Play They Hope You Won’t Figure Out/Lisa A Romano

Narcissists play all sorts of mind games hoping they will be able to lure you in by gaining your trust. Once they gain your trust, they go to work executing all sorts of narcissistic mind games. The mind games of a narcissist are created to keep you feeling off-balance, insecure, and worrying about your state of mind. The more mind games a narcissist can play, the better they are at keeping you in the narcissistic abuse cycle. Although there are many different mind games narcissist play, in this video I address 10 mind games they play. They play mind games to fake you out, remain the boss inside the relationship, and work diligently at manipulating you to believe you are responsible for just about everything and anything. Narcissists play mind games so they can avoid intimacy, feeling vulnerable and maintain control over their victims. Narcissistic abuse is a form of emotional abuse. Narcissists use mind games as a form of covert abuse. Covert narcissists are difficult to spot but if you know the mind games they play, it can help you save your time, money, heart, and life from unnecessary narcissistic abuse.


  1. Fake Out: Empathy to get close to you.  Then use confidence against you
  2. One Up:  Must always maintain superiority.  If you’re up, they must bring you down
  3. It wasn’t me.  It doesn’t matter what lie you catch them in, they never accept accountability.
  4. Do you smell smoke:  (Gas lighting)   You have to know yourself whether you suffer from low self-esteem and are vulnerable.  Saying things that aren’t true to get a reaction out of you.
    1. If you feel like you should be recording conversations to play them back to prove your side, that’s a warning sign
    2. They are remembering everything about you, probing your wounds, but often not sharing (honestly) about themselves.
    3. Pay attention if they redirect the conversation on you.
  5. I’m the boss around here: work to keep anger under wraps.  May have ill will towards you.  Do not want to meet you in the middle.
    1. need to show you who the boss is.  If they sense loss of power or being held accountable which they can’t do because they associate that with vulnerability which they associate with weakness
  6. little red riding hood: wolf in sheep’s clothing.  Inconsistency: Vegan, but kick the dog
  7. Rico Swave, Feme Fatale
  8. nothing makes sense: goal is to keep you insecure.  Hot and Cold
  9. if you feel off balance
    1. do i feel seen, safe.  Do they meet half way.  Do they have a history of cheating.